Tonight I'm thinking about friends, female friends in particular, and how much they mean to me. I'm a person who makes friends slowly, so the ones I have are valued beyond my ability to express. There are long-standing friends, who've seen me through my more embarassing stages as well as the times I'm rolling along well; new friends who may not know me 'for the distance' but who've managed to make room for me in their busy lives; acquaintances from work who've managed to make the leap to friendship; and friends from hobbies & school.
Recently we had dinner at my friend Anja's house - it was our annual reunion of ex-Exacters. We all worked together at the same company and we come together every summer at Anja's large, inviting home. Anja first taught me a lot about how to do my job better, and then she took me under her wing after my divorce. She's a good person and I'm lucky to call her friend.
Another workplace friend is Michelle, a Canadian who moved home to Nova Scotia more than 6 years ago but who recently contacted me out of the blue to say she's coming back here for a visit.
And there's Terra, who started off as a workplace friend, then became an invaluable ally in my blossoming romance with Niek (who is now my better half). Terra is also a good friend to my oldest son. And despite the fact that she also moved home to Canada, our friendship continues to evolve - she's now becoming a cross stitch buddy!
For long-standing friends, Sara pretty much steals the show. She's seen me through it all from the age of 18 on. She taught me to cross stitch, how to taste & drink wine, how to enjoy food... she introduced me new kinds of music, to a new kind of family life ... she showed me first-hand how to jump right in and enjoy life.
And you know, friendship and family aren't mutually exclusive! My mom has become an incredible friend and supportive influence. Our moms are so critical to our own self image - to have a healthy & happy relationship just makes life so much better on all levels. Mom and I have seen each other through some phases we'd probably like to both forget, but we've also managed to come out the other end and still like each other! Not many relationships can claim that!
I have a whole lot of new cyberfriends from cross stitching, and soon several of us will have our first face-to-face meeting. I'm terribly excited and really looking forward to meeting. Annemarie, in particular, gave me the courage to come online with my little projects in the first place. I really didn't think my work was good/interesting/unique enough for anyone else to be interested. Ash has explained things to me that I thought were way beyond my abilities. Everyone has shared and been supportive. There are also cyberfriends I probably never will meet, but whose online support has really helped me out (hi Mady & Maria & Jennifer!).
There are friends I may never see again but who live on in my heart. I miss them and I wish I could tell them the enormous impact they've had on my life. Donna, Stacy, Anna: I know you're out there somewhere, but you're in here, too.
And there are friends I really will never see again, which is sad. But they'll live on in me as long as I'm on the green side of the grass. My grandmothers and Mrs. Spooner: I wish I had one more chance to say I love you. And to say thank you.
I guess one of the reasons I'm drawn to stitching is because of the sense of community with other women. I like feeling part of your projects and I like your input into what I'm doing. I would love to indulge in some sort of old-fashioned quilting bee (but on a cross stitching basis) with a bunch of women. Stitch and chat and just soak up the atmosphere of a day spent together doing something that makes us happy. It sounds so wonderful, don't you agree?
